Hailey recently began her second semester at MSU and so far it seems like it’s smooth sailing for her. Her first semester… eh, not so much. The past few months have been a huge adjustment for everyone in the family, even Nolan, Hailey’s bf. When I think back to move-in day, this past August, I literally tear up. Driving away, as she stood there on the sidewalk with tears streaming down both of our faces, nearly ripped the heart out of my chest. Here’s a montage I pulled together…
Move-in Day at MSU
Aug 27th, 2011
Letting go was the theme that gained momentum for our family in 2011, and it doesn’t seem to be losing any steam now that we’re ankle deep in 2012. I raised my girls using the principles of Cline & Fay’s, “Parenting with Love & Logic”.
Shortly after Neil and I married in 2007, we set out on a day trip to Wisconsin. Unbeknownst to him, I secretly packed the audio CD version of Parenting with Love & Logic. During hour number 2 of our 17 hour journey, he grumbled as I switched his tunes off and popped the CD in. He didn’t want to listen to some psychiatrist talk at him about ‘parenting pearls’, but once the content got meaty we were both fully engaged.
On the drive home we had the most productive chat about the types of parents we were (I’m a helicopter, Neil was a combo of all three styles: a consultant, a helicopter, and a drill sergeant, with strong drill sergeant tendencies), and best yet, we talked candidly about how to get where we want to be, as parents.
Over the years, and especially within the past 6 months, Neil has transitioned gracefully into the role of a consultant, while I, not-so-gracefully, bounce back and forth between holding strong to my helicopter roots to being a loving consultant. (Consultant… good; helicopter…bad!) Ahh, letting go is so hard.
If you’ve never heard of Parenting with Love & Logic, I highly recommend it. Click here for the version that deals mainly with kids. Click here for the teen version.
So Hailey asked me to come visit her at school this week (a first, woo!) We spent a wonderful evening chatting over lettuce wraps and honey chicken at PF Changs. I listened intently as she talked about school, what she likes (math, freedom, her room-mate), what she doesn’t like (community bathrooms, lack of privacy, dorm food with names-you-can’t-pronounce).
After dinner, we shopped the clearance racks at DSW and scored a few gems. I dropped her off with a full heart and some extra mittens and hats in case it ever decides to be winter. I miss her. A lot. But I’m excited to see the adult she is turning into before my very eyes.
xo
